A hot-tempered person starts fights; a cool-tempered person stops them. [Proverbs 15:18 (NLT)]
Scoundrels create trouble; their words are a destructive blaze. … Better to be patient than powerful; better to have self-control than to conquer a city. [Proverbs 16:27,32 (NLT)]
Battlefields aren’t found just in war-torn nations. They can be found in some of the nicest homes, work places, neighborhoods (and even churches). Unfortunately, some people delight in controversy and discord. They may be passive-aggressive or simply aggressive. Frequently, they deliberately say something provocative just to get a reaction and start conflict. Rather than discuss, they argue and debate. Their goal has nothing to do with conflict resolution or agreement; it is to be victorious in their battle, no matter what the cost.
These word soldiers seek out their targets and battlegrounds and it’s easy to be drawn into their drama. Naturally, we want to defend others, ourselves, or our beliefs when attacked, especially when done unjustly, irrationally or unreasonably. Nevertheless, we don’t have to engage in a tug-of-war—nothing says we have to pick up the rope and start pulling just because the other guy has the rope in his hand. It’s not a question of winning or losing; it’s a question of staying out of the battle in the first place. We don’t have to attend every argument to which we’re invited! Moreover, if we do pick up the rope, there’s nothing shameful about dropping it and simply walking away. We’re not defeated when we choose a higher road; we’re just wiser! I’ve found that when reason has left the room, it’s time for me to go, as well!
Lord, guide us through the minefields of life. Grant us the wisdom to know when it is best to keep our mouths shut, the insight to know when it is best to walk away, and the courage to do so. May we have obedient and loving hearts so that, instead of responding in anger, we pray for those who attack us. Keep our hearts free from rancor and the need to get even; let there be peace in our lives.
Discussion is an exchange of knowledge; an argument an exchange of ignorance. [Robert Quillen]
The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it. [Dale Carnegie]
Many years ago, we did some major remodeling on our lake house. The original structure was gutted: carpets ripped up, paneling pulled off, decks knocked down, stairs demolished, walls cut open, and our landscaping ruined. Filled with fear and misgivings, I stared at the gaping hole in the hillside and what was left of the original dwelling. The architect/builder kept reassuring me that, having drawn the plans, he knew how everything would eventually fit together. Me? I just saw the ruined house, a deep pit and piles of dirt. I hadn’t expected this devastation; it had seemed so simple on paper. How this mess was ever going to become the house we’d pictured, I didn’t know. I simply had to trust the builder and leave it in his hands. Seven months later, I stood in the same spot, thrilled with the final result; it was better than I’d ever expected!
Tithe means ten percent and the Jews were required to give ten percent of all they earned or grew as part of their worship. Because there were three required tithes, the actual percentage given was more like 23%. One tithe went to the Levites, another was for the use of the temple and religious festivals, and a third one, required every third year, was for the poor. Although no tithes were collected from the land on the seventh (Sabbath) and 50th (Jubilee) years or when there was drought or famine, tithing was mandatory at any other time and the Israelites got in trouble with God when they didn’t fulfill this obligation.
At times, we can find reading the Bible rather disturbing. For me, Peter calling Lot “righteous” is upsetting; this man offered up his virgin daughters to be raped by a mob! Abraham’s willingness to hand over Sarah to other men’s lust is equally disquieting. Those are, however, real stories about real people and, among other things, they reflect the low status of women in the ancient world. The Bible’s words may have been God-breathed and intended for people of all times and places but they were penned by men thousands of years ago for their contemporaries and their words reflect a very different culture.
At my age, I’ve attended a fair share of funerals and they’ve run the gamut from full-blown productions complete with video presentations and choirs to a few mourners on a windy ski slope with a bag of ashes. Some ministers knew the deceased well and others couldn’t even pronounce the name correctly. There have been inspiring prayers and eulogies and some with no prayer at all. They’ve taken place in jam-packed churches and nearly empty mortuary chapels. Solomon was correct; there is a lot we can learn at funerals.
