And the angel said to them, “Fear not, for behold, I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord. [Luke 2:10-11 (ESV)]
Even though “Black Friday” sales already have started and stores have been decorated for Christmas since Halloween, the holiday season doesn’t officially start until Thursday with Thanksgiving. Although the angel brought good news of joy to the shepherds and told them not to be afraid, the holiday season brings a sense of dread and anxiety for many of us. “Stress” and “family” are two words that shouldn’t go together but often do. The dynamics of several families and generations gathering together over the holidays can put a strain on everyone as different traditions, expectations, politics, and faiths collide with one another. Couples struggle to keep both in-laws and parents happy while grandparents overindulge their grands. Children get too much sugar and not enough sleep, too much money is spent, and too much alcohol often gets consumed. Add to that the challenges presented by long-distance travel with its almost inevitable lost luggage, delays, or cancellations and trying to maintain peace at a politically divided dinner table and we have the makings of a perfect storm! The joy of the season easily gets lost in the stress of the season.
Hoping to have a perfectly orchestrated Thanksgiving feast and Christmas celebration, we often have unrealistic expectations and are disappointed when they’re not met. In actuality, our holiday is more likely to resemble that of the Griswolds than anything we’ll see on the Hallmark channel. Because we don’t live in TV-land, our problems won’t be resolved in ninety minutes and happy endings are not guaranteed. Things can and will go awry and there are no retakes when they do. Babies cry and spit up, toddlers have tantrums, children get tired and cranky, adolescents pout, milk spills, cakes fall, roasts burn, toys break, people sing out of tune, planes get delayed, and someone’s feelings are sure to get hurt. We just have to learn to accept and love the imperfections of our loved ones and understand that chaos and confusion are a part of life. Let us resign ourselves to the noise, disorder, and stress that comes with any family gathering and concentrate on the love, joy, and peace God brought to us when Jesus came into the world so very long ago.
Lord, guide us this holiday season so that what should be a joyous time of year doesn’t become a joyless one. Help us to have realistic expectations as we celebrate Thanksgiving and Christmas. Please, give us an extra dose of patience and a sense of humor when things go awry. May your message of love and peace fill our hearts and minds.
Thirty years ago, Al Franken played a character on Saturday Night Live named Stuart Smalley. Host of a fictitious self-help show called “Daily Affirmations with Stuart Smalley,” Stuart would look into in a mirror and affirm that he was good enough, smart enough, and that people liked him. A member of several twelve-step programs, Stuart often shared maxims like, “Denial Ain’t Just a River in Egypt!” along with affirmations that he was entitled to his share of happiness and (my personal favorite) that it is easier to put on slippers than to carpet the world.
I thought of that great fixed chasm between heaven and hell again after reading C.S. Lewis’ fantasy, The Great Divorce. Lewis clearly warns his readers that the book is a fantasy, what he calls “imaginative supposal,” and should be read that way. He does, however, add that it does have a moral. The book’s unnamed narrator (presumed to be Lewis) describes what seems to be hell as a grey, dingy, and utterly joyless place where quarrelsome souls continually argue with one another and move further and further apart. Finding himself there, the narrator joins others as they take a bus ride from this grey world to a vibrant, beautiful, and substantial place that appears to be heaven.
When Paul addressed a Christian’s relationship with his enemies, he said never to return evil for evil and to act honorably so we don’t reflect badly on the Gospel. Paul qualified his direction to live in peace with all by adding, “if possible, so far as it depends on you.” While some people don’t want to live in peace, as Christians, we must refuse to instigate, escalate, or participate in conflict. Since peace-loving people who won’t return evil with more of the same tend to be the sort of people who are taken advantage of, Paul then addresses the issue of revenge. Quoting Deuteronomy 32:25, he makes it clear that we are not to retaliate; vengeance is solely God’s department, not ours.
Days bled into weeks, weeks into months, and every day seemed the same for much of the last eighteen months. Life became a series of postponements, rebookings, cancelations, setbacks, inconveniences, letdowns, and disappointments. Visiting Grandma meant waving at her through a window, final farewells were FaceTime calls on a nurse’s cell phone, and we mourned from a distance while attending celebrations of life virtually. Weddings were postponed, family reunions put on hold, shut-downs and travel restrictions kept loved ones apart, theaters and concert halls went dark, vacations were delayed, businesses closed, jobs were lost, and junior year abroad became junior year on Zoom.
You know the generous grace of our Lord Jesus Christ. Though he was rich, yet for your sakes he became poor, so that by his poverty he could make you rich. [2 Corinthians 8:9 (NLT)]
Devotions of the Heart 