And when they were in the field, Cain rose up against his brother Abel and killed him. Then the Lord said to Cain, “Where is Abel your brother?” He said, “I do not know; am I my brother’s keeper?” [Genesis 4:8-9 (ESV)]
The story is told of a Sunday school teacher who was teaching her class about the Ten Commandments. “What is the commandment about parents?” she asked. “Honor thy father and mother,” was the quick reply. “Is there a commandment about brothers and sisters?” the teacher queried. One little boy shouted, “Thou shalt not kill!” While we know we’re not supposed to kill them, how should we treat them?
When we look at sibling relationships in the Bible, we don’t see a lot of good examples. Starting with Cain and Abel, Cain’s anger over God’s acceptance of Abel’s offering led to the Bible’s first homicide. When Ishmael teased his younger half-brother Isaac, he and his mother were evicted from Abraham’s home. Then we have sisters Leah and Rachel who continually competed for Jacob’s attention. The twins Jacob and Esau were at odds from birth and, after stealing his brother’s birthright, Jacob had to flee for his life. Resentment and jealousy caused Miriam and Aaron to complain about Moses’ leadership, jealousy led Joseph’s brothers to sell him into slavery, and after Jehoram became king, he killed all six of his brothers. David’s brothers didn’t respect him, Martha and Mary had disagreements about priorities, and Jesus’ brothers failed to believe in Him at first. Among the disciples, Peter and Andrew were brothers as were James and John, but we know that the disciples argued about which of them was the greatest! Clearly, sibling rivalry, jealousy, and conflict has a long history in mankind.
Siblings can be one of the greatest blessings in life but they also pose one of the greatest challenges of childhood. Even as adults, sibling relationships can be difficult to navigate. We know each other’s weaknesses and fears; we know what upset our siblings in the past and what buttons to push to annoy them now. We often know each other’s deepest secrets and most embarrassing moments and, unfortunately, can wield that information like a sword. Siblings easily can be tactless, rude, and cruel with one another in a way they’d never be with their friends. When we’re with siblings, we may even revert to old roles and behaviors from our childhood days.
While siblings share parentage and history, true brothers and sisters share far more than genetics and memories. If we want to have brothers and sisters, instead of just siblings, we might look to the example of Joseph who saved the lives of the same brothers who betrayed and abandoned him! He literally became his brothers’ keeper.
In spite of whatever happened in the past, if we want brothers and sisters, we need to relinquish any long-buried resentment and practice forgiveness (along with a fair amount of forgetfulness). When siblings disappoint as they inevitably will (as will we), our love will keep us from despairing in or giving up on them. An accident of birth may give us siblings but there’s nothing accidental about choosing to love and it is choosing to love that turns a sibling into a brother or sister.
When Cain asked God, “Am I my brother’s keeper?” the Hebrew word was hashomer. From the root word shamar, it meant protector, guardian, defender, and caretaker. What do you think God’s answer was?
When I came across this revised version of the 23rd Psalm, I was sure it was written by a cynic as a way of mocking God, Christianity, and many of today’s popular evangelists. Imagine my surprise when I learned that it was written in all seriousness by Charles Fillmore, the founder of Unity, a church within the New Thought movement. The “revised” psalm was published in Fillmore’s book Prosperity in 1938. Although we may associate the beginnings of prosperity or “health and wealth” theology with televangelists like Jimmy Swaggart and Jim and Tammy Bakker in the 1970s, the movement began in the late 19th century. Sadly, in one form or another, it still is preached today.
Last month, there were sentencing hearings for two politicians in a northern state. One pled guilty to bribery and the other pled guilty to wire fraud and money laundering. Even though both men abused their positions and betrayed the public’s trust, both of their lawyers argued that their clients’ crimes really weren’t that bad so they didn’t deserve time in jail. In direct reference to the crimes of a former governor of their state, one lawyer argued that wire fraud and money laundering were insignificant when compared to bribing government officials to get lucrative contracts, trying to buy a Senate seat, or shaking down hospitals to get campaign contributions. After the other lawyer pointed out how little money his client actually pocketed from his crime, he called his client’s bribery “a brief dalliance with corruption,” cast the blame on another corrupt official who encouraged him, and assured the court that his client wasn’t a bad person but just a “good person who made a mistake in judgment.”
My husband loves to watch the chefs on Food Network but watching food being prepared on television doesn’t fill his empty stomach any more than just seeing his bottle will quiet a hungry baby. I could show you photos of the tulips and daffodils in Holland’s Keukenhof Gardens but that wouldn’t give you the experience of walking among hundreds of thousands of blooming flowers and smelling their fragrant aroma. You could tell me all about your children and even show me their pictures and, while I’d know about them and even recognize them, I wouldn’t know them until we met face to face and spent time together. Before I had my first child, I attended birthing classes and read all about labor and childbirth but nothing I learned came anywhere near to approximating the actual event! It’s been thrilling watching the Olympic athletes compete in the bobsled and monobob events, but watching from my sofa doesn’t come close to actually riding a sled down an icy track at more than 80-mph, dropping 384 feet in less than a mile while negotiating 16 turns, and feeling forces five times the pull of gravity on one’s body! Second-hand information is fine as far as it goes, but it never equals the genuine experience.
While I’ve been challenged by a scarcity of things like patience, endurance, and wisdom, I confess to never facing a bare cupboard, empty refrigerator, unfilled closet, or depleted bank account and never wondering where I would sleep at night or how I would feed or clothe my children. It’s not that difficult to trust God for His daily provision when we already have more than enough. Trusting Him when the cupboard is bare (or nearly so) is an entirely different story and a new experience for me. It’s not that I’m facing bankruptcy or foreclosure but that my supply of devotions is rapidly diminishing. It seems like I’m publishing faster than I can write and I can’t seem to get ahead. Watching my stockpile diminish, I envision blog bankruptcy and worry threatens my faith in God’s provision.
