For he issued his laws to Jacob; he gave his instructions to Israel. He commanded our ancestors to teach them to their children, so the next generation might know them—even the children not yet born—and they in turn will teach their own children. So each generation should set its hope anew on God, not forgetting his glorious miracles and obeying his commands. [Psalm 78:5-7 (NLT)]
A friend recently confided her mixed feelings about her son’s future plans. The good news: not only has he been accepted at the graduate school of his choice, but he also has secured the necessary funding. The bad news: it’s in New Zealand, far away from Florida and the safety of home. Her words reminded me of nearly twenty years ago when my daughter finished her schooling and completed her dietetic internship. She’d been offered two jobs: one in New Mexico, where she knew no one and had never been, and one less than an hour from our suburban Illinois home. With only twenty-four hours to deliberate before she had to make her decision, there were several frantic phone calls that night. As I spoke with my daughter, my mama’s heart was breaking. I didn’t want my baby to leave the nest, but God strengthened my heart and put wise words in my mouth. We spoke of my daughter’s internship experiences; I reminded her of the comments she’d made after her stint in the outpatient clinic: “This is what I want to do!” The New Mexico offer was in their outpatient clinic; the Illinois offer was vague and less promising. It was clear that the better job was in New Mexico, but that meant moving, leaving the comfort of friends and family, and the great unknown! When my daughter expressed concerns about the ability to move and be in New Mexico less than a week after graduation, I reassured her that her father and I could make it happen. I told her to pray about her decision, reminding her that this choice shouldn’t be determined by convenience, but by her calling and God’s guidance. We hung up and, I’m ashamed to say, I didn’t want her to make what I believed to be the right choice. I wanted her to stay near family and friends; I wanted her safe in our circle. It was with a reluctant heart that I prayed: “God, let her make the right choice, not the choice I want. Give me a happy heart no matter what her decision.”
Within three weeks’ time, my daughter had moved to Albuquerque and was busy in her new job. Was it the right choice? Because of government cutbacks, the Illinois job position was eliminated within six months. Her move to Albuquerque led her to a wonderful man, a deeper faith, a beautiful daughter, new friends, several sisters in Christ, and an even better and more rewarding career. Thank you, God, for taking her under your wings!
No matter how old our children, we never want to let them go; but let them go we must. If we have taught them well, our part is done. Parenthood is a job that is supposed to become obsolete. Once we’ve taught our children to fly, we should praise God when we see them spread their wings and soar. There are many children who, because of disabilities, will never be able to fly away; we should be thankful when ours can! Of course, that doesn’t mean we don’t continue to love and even on occasion, worry about them. We call them, probably more than we should, and pray about them, probably less than we should.
Father in heaven, give us happy hearts when our children leave our homes. Teach them, guard them, lead them and lift them so they may soar!
