You shall not steal; you shall not deal falsely; you shall not lie to one another. [Leviticus 19:11 (ESV)]
A faithful witness does not lie, but a false witness breathes out lies. … A false witness will not go unpunished, and he who breathes out lies will perish. [Proverbs 14:5,19:9 (ESV)]
Planning to place her home on the market, a neighbor asked my friend, “Isn’t this an absolutely perfect floor plan?” Not wanting to hurt her neighbor’s feelings, she made a vague comment implying agreement. In actuality, my friend dislikes the floor plan and believes it will deter buyers. Later, she asked me how to have answered honestly without offending her neighbor.
In the movie Liar Liar, comedian Jim Carrey portrays a glib lawyer who plays fast and loose with the truth. When his son wishes he’d tell the truth, the insincere and conniving man cannot lie for 24 hours and immediately finds himself in hot water. Many of his problems, however, don’t come from telling the truth as much as they do from his callousness and insensitivity. The self-centered man doesn’t know the difference between brutal honesty and truthful tact, crudeness and candor, vulgarity and restraint, or rudeness and civility. Among other things, the comedy illustrates that lying, while wrong, is often far easier than telling the truth.
White lies—we all tell them at one time or another. While wondering when an innocent white lie becomes a guilty gray, I looked to the Bible and realized there is no line between the two. Deception of any kind didn’t exist until Satan, the father of all lies, brought it into the garden and deceit remains his primary weapon. The Israelites were commanded to be truthful in all things and lying is condemned throughout Scripture. Jesus said he was the truth and the way without adding the words “most of the time” or “only when convenient!” Regardless of its size or intent, a lie is a deception and the Bible seems pretty clear about deceit; God doesn’t like it! The end never justifies the means if the means involves sin.
What about a lie of expediency? After all, Abraham, Rahab, Peter and David all lied. Can we lie to protect ourselves or someone else, to prevent needless worry, or to spare feelings? If lying is wrong, can lying be less wrong in some situations? Truth, however, isn’t relative so it would seem that any lie is wrong. In the end, it is God who sees into the hearts of man and decides the rightness or wrongness of both our motives and our words.
For the most part, white lies are just the lazy way out of a sticky situation. It’s easier to spin off a lie than to find a way to be honest, tactful and considerate. Nevertheless, when we tell people the dress isn’t too tight when it is, the check’s in the mail when it isn’t, the procedure won’t hurt when it will, or we’re busy when we aren’t, we’ve done more than lie; we’ve given false witness and stolen the truth. Moreover, when they look in the mirror, see the postmark, feel the pain, or discover the duplicity, we’ve lost our credibility both as a friend and a Christian. While it may not be easy, it is possible to be loving and honest at the same time.
On the flip side, perhaps we also should be more willing to hear the truth. When we ask if the pants make our butt look big, do we look tired, were we wrong, or did the family enjoy the tofu casserole, we better not take offense when we get an honest answer.
Hang this question up in your homes – “What would Jesus do?” and then think of another – “How would Jesus do it?” For what Jesus would do, and how He would do it, may always stand as the best guide to us. [Charles Spurgeon]